I like to consider the five office gifts of Ephesians 4:11 as the GRACE GIFTS. (Five being the number for grace…it just seems fitting to refer to these gifts as such.)
When God gave these offices to the church, I believe He considered each of them to be a gift. Truly, a pastor is a gift that God has given to the church. We often refer to the title “pastor” but in essence a pastor is very much a “shepherd” – someone who oversees the flock.
Recently, I shared a blog post about How To Relate To Your Pastor. The reason is because many times we look at a pastor (shepherd) and think all they do is preach in the pulpit on Sunday. Sometimes we fail to see the invisible hours of administrating, care giving, studying, mental preparation, organizing, dealing with issues, planning, counseling, etc., all of which require long hours and bring lots of criticism.
Sometimes pastors can be terribly misunderstood by their congregations which can cause a loss of joy and heaping handfuls of discouragement.
How do you encourage the encourager?
Here are a few things to consider :
- Don’t forget the overall vision: This is vital because if you forget where the church is going, you’ll get bogged down with items (i.e., disgruntlement , complaints, politics, goofy stuff, etc.) that aren’t crucial to the overall destination of the church and the heart of the pastor.
- Be longsuffering and considerate: as you serve with your pastor, you will also be serving with his/her spouse and children. If you hold them to an ideology of “perfection” then you will be disappointed the first time you see their humanness. Remember, they are human too and face the same things you face. Your acceptance will make their inner beauty shine as they settle into their role.
- Trust their decisions: this isn’t always easy, especially when you aren’t privy to all the facts of a matter. However, realize that your pastor often times has to protect the information about others so that no further damage is done to an individual’s/families testimony. In doing so, the pastor is handling the matter with professionalism and etiquette.
- Join the construction crew…not the demolition crew: As you demonstrate faithfulness in your time, talent and treasure, you will bring refreshment to your pastor’s spirit.
- Avoid being disrespectful: A good rule of thumb is to always treat people like you want to be treated. If you sow respect, you will reap respect. Your pastor is not your employee to talk down to. He or she is your spiritual leader. Paul gave reference to this in 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13 12And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you; 13And to esteem them very highly in love for their work’s sake. And be at peace among yourselves.
- Refuse to gossip or allow anyone else to gossip/slander/criticize your pastor: Anyone who serves in leadership will face the glare of public scrutiny and speculation. Even the wrong assumption can undermine your leader’s credibility. Refuse to “assumicide” your pastor. If you have a concern, speak to him or her personally not on facebook, through emails or text messages. Criticizing them behind their back will only harm them and become infectious to anyone privy to your words. Determine to put a stop to any bad mouthing that is going on by speaking affirmation and positive statements. Remember Paul’s instruction in 1 Timothy 5:19 19Against an elder receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses.
- Affirm your pastor through appreciation: when you look for ways to bless the man or woman of God you are actually enabling them to stay focused on their ministry assignment. Cards, letters, offerings, etc., go a long way in keeping your pastor encouraged. It costs your pastor just as much to live as it does you. Refer to 1 Timothy 5:17-18 17Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honour, especially they who labour in the word and doctrine. 18For the scripture saith, Thou shalt not muzzle the ox that treadeth out the corn. And, The labourer is worthy of his reward.
- Be a genuine friend not a fair weather friend: situations will arise in the ministry that will be difficult. Your pastor needs to know that you’re not looking for an exit at the first sign of trouble. Consider the way your pastor has stood with you during your hour of affliction or trial, has protected you from the wolves, has guided you when you were misguided, has loved you unconditionally even through failures.
- Join the Pastor’s Prayer Covering: commit yourself to pray for your pastor especially when they are bringing the word of God to the congregation. When you and your family pray over your meal, say a special prayer over your pastor and his/her family too. Speak life, peace, love, hope, faith, joy, wisdom, strength, encouragement and abundance over them. 2 Thessalonians 3:1-2 1Finally, brethren, pray for us, that the word of the Lord may have free course, and be glorified, even as it is with you: 2And that we may be delivered from unreasonable and wicked men: for all men have not faith.
- Find new ways to encourage him/her: If your pastor has helped you…tell him/her. Ephesians 4:29 declares, 29Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. Proverbs 3:27 27Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it. Use birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, etc., as a way to express your love. A kind word doesn’t cost anything.