You're either running FROM something or running TO something. Until you fix what's IN you you'll always be OUT of sorts while God is trying to PERFECT (mature) you.Don't let the PRESSURE of PERFECTION cause your feet to wonder. Stay ROOTED. God desires to get MUCH FRUIT out of you, as He matures every part of your life. It's a PROCESS.
If you opt out of the PROCESS, to pursue what's easy, you'll forfeit the PROMISE and miss your PURPOSE.
There's a reason you FEEL the way you do. You cannot escape the knowing of God's DEALINGS in your heart, even when everyone around you is telling you "it's OK."
God is saying, "wait on me." God is saying, "I will perfect that which concerns you." God is saying, "I have planted you for a purpose." God is saying, "I will keep you aligned with like faith."
Trees are PLANTED and take time to mature to the place where they can provide FRUIT and SHADE to those closest to them or those coming to them. If you UPROOT too soon, you stunt your growth and delay your season. The SEASONS of God produce BARK, BRANCHES, LEAVES, BLOOMS and FRUIT.
You're GROWING but you're not GROWN yet. Yes, you've been PLANTED, you've SPROUTED and you can now see your own SHADE as the sun (spotlight) is shining on you. But your ROOTS are where your strength is. What cannot be seen is more important to God than what can be seen by others.
Don't forget the SOIL where God allowed your SEED to be planted. It's nutrients, though at times muddy and plain, remain the garden of your SEEDLINE.
Praying for you.