Showing posts with label Trust. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Trust. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 9, 2023

Dealing With Slander

#DearLeader

When a slanderer sets his/her sights on discrediting you, trust God to expose his/her deception & reveal his/her motives.

• Do not jump into the mud with them.
• Resist the urge to chase down every lie.
Guard your heart from resentment.
• Allow your circle to prove itself.
• Stay in love with JESUS. 🙂

Treat People The Way You Want To Be Treated

#DearLeader

Treat people the way you’d want to be treated if you were to ever find yourself in the same situation.

The way you treat people should never be affected by the way they treat you. But once you see who they are & what they're about, ADJUST.

Loyalty - There Is No In Between


1. At this point in my life, loyalty is an all or nothing proposition. There is no in between. You either are or you aren’t.
2. This week, examine the level of loyalty you give to your covenant relationships. Faithfulness is to an ideal, assignment or promise. Loyalty is to a person. Are you loyal?
3. Loyalty is a huge deal. It's not something you choose when it's convenient. It's how you let people know you can be trusted!
Leaguership
www.russellhylton.com

Tuesday, March 29, 2022

Can You Be Trusted?

When you place your TRUST in someone, you're confirming your confidence in their integrity, ability & character. That is not a light thing. In fact, when you give someone your trust, you are giving them a very close space near your heart...an area that is tender & willingly open. For trust to continue, there must be a sacred covenant of loyalty & an internal decision not to misuse that trust.

One example: As a pastor/minister, when I stand in someone else's pulpit...I realize that I am there by invitation & given latitude to operate in my gifts & abilities for the glory of God & the good of those who have placed their trust in me. I am careful to operate in proper alignment with the leadership of the house & not to assume that I can just "take my liberty", because of the anointing (empowerment to serve) I sense. I always bare in mind that I am invited to function in my calling & gift in divine alignment with the angel of the house. I don't "freestyle" or "pull rabbits out of hats" when I have the mic. Trust has been placed in me either through relational equity or experience, to carry the continuity of the house...being mindful of the climate & culture of the house while fulfilling my assignment.
I have seen trust trampled on because of showmanship & personal desire. Sadly, when you can no longer trust a person to operate in proper protocol, you can no longer ENTRUST them with responsibility. To entrust means to give over (something) to another for care, protection or performance.
Basically, there are two kinds of people who seek to be in a relationship with you: 1) Those who want what's in your heart. 2) Those who want what's in your hand. You have to discern the difference. It's one thing for you to enter into people's lives...but another to entrust your life to them.
One way that I've learned to gauge trust is in the way someone talks to me about someone else. If they reveal entrusted secrets to you & you still entrust them with your secrets...you're just asking for heartbreak.
Years ago, someone I trusted spoke negatively to me about a mutual friend. I was rather shocked, not at the things they were trying to allude to in a negative connotation, but because I knew this person they were talking bad about had been very good to them & I too held that person in high regard. I didn't immediately pull back my trust in this person, but I watched the way they operated from that point forward & eventually knew that I couldn't carry the same level of relationship with them as I had before. I realized that if they talked about someone else to me...they would talk about me to someone else, too.
Now, don't get me wrong. I believe in repentance, restoration & plenty of "second chances”. I've extended many olive branches in my life & I've also had olive branches extended to me, as well. I believe in graceful relationships. I believe that we should see the best in one another...be honest & forthright with one another...not seek to plot someone's downfall with hearsay, secret meetings, plots & schemes. Thankfully, those things backfire on people who live like that. It is ALWAYS best to talk with a person face-to-face, rather than to believe what's being said about them. True covenant relationship is, "I will talk with you...not about you."
Once trust is broken, it's difficult to recover it. However, it can be recovered through the help of The Lord. It might be a marriage relationship, ministry relationship, employee/employer relationship, etc. God is able to restore all things.
To be trusted is a big deal. To be loved & trusted is a great responsibility. Manage both well.

Tuesday, May 12, 2020

Loneliness, Isolation, Trust & True Friends

Before the Covid-19 shutdown of businesses, I had an appointment with a new optometrist. I hadn’t seen an eye doctor for more than a decade but age has been creeping up on me & I knew it was time to get an exam.

While I was sitting in the waiting room, filling out the new patient paperwork, I looked at one of the questions & begin to reflect.

I’ve been asked this question many times & breezed through it without batting an eye. But this time, I just sat & stared at the question because it stood out to me.

Ok, you’re probably wondering what the question is...here it is: "Who Should We Contact In Case Of An Emergency?"  

Beverly is the name I write down, without hesitation. But as I sat & looked at that question, my thoughts went to anyone who might not be able to answer that question rapidly.  Perhaps at one time in their life, they could think of 3-4 names automatically. However, due to situations they no longer can.

My heart began to feel heavy for anyone that feels alone or feels like they have no one to trust.

I had a misty-eyed moment in the waiting room. I was thankful that I could name at least 20 or more names…people I know who will be there for Beverly or I if we needed help.

If I can be honest with you…circumstances, betrayal & time can reduce that number to the point that you lose trust in people & find it difficult to trust anyone at all.

The natural thing to do is to focus inward, to trust no one - to spend as much time as possible alone & isolated, because at least you don’t have to worry about being betrayed, hurt or disappointed.  

I grew up listening to a song that said this…

Me and Jesus, got our own thing goin'
Me and Jesus, got it all worked out
Me and Jesus, got our own thing goin'
We don't need anybody to tell us what it's all about

After all, all I need is Jesus, right?  
Jesus said He would never leave me or forsake me - that He would always be with me - so why do I even need anyone else?  

Here’s why…BECAUSE YOU CANNOT DO LIFE ALONE!

Yes, I need a strong, growing relationship with Christ, but I also need a strong, growing relationship with others...if I am truly going to experience the abundant life that Jesus promises.  

That’s not always easy. Risk is involved. You can get hurt, betrayed & even abandoned over & over.  But just because it's hard doesn't mean we should not try.  

We need relationships!  God designed us to do life with others. He designed for us to have the help of others.

I’m not sharing this because I’m looking for new friends or for people to text me & say, “we love you.”  I’m sharing this because I know there are people out there who feel isolated & lonely.  People who don’t want to feel that way & they wish things were different but due to circumstances they don’t know if they can ever trust anyone again.

Believe me…I understand.

Look at this verse in Proverbs 18:24 “One who has unreliable friends soon come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

It’s not easy…but it’s worth it!

Isolation is not the answer.  Rather, I believe true joy comes in the context of a group of people who will stand with you & love you – no matter what!

Are those people hard to find? Yes.

But, when you do find them…I can honestly say you will one day look back & know it was worth it.

If you’ve been ISOLATING yourself because of lost hope…today, I want you to rethink that decision.  I’m not asking you to simply make superficial friends who you always feel like you have to pretend to be someone else when you are around them…I’m saying don’t stay stuck in isolation!

There’s a powerful passage in 2 Samuel 23 that stands out to me.
“Next to him (David) was Shammah son of Agee the Hararite. When the Philistines banded together at a place where there was a field full of lentils, Israel’s troops fled from them. But Shammah took his stand in the middle of the field. He defended it and struck the Philistines down, and the Lord brought about a great victory.”

David was in a battle, it was intense and all of Israel's troops fled and left David in the middle of a field all alone, surrounded by the enemy.  

But there was Shammah...

He wasn't the guy who always told David, "I've got your back," but rather stood back to back with him when everyone else ran & they (together) brought about a victory.  

After this battle David could have mourned the loss of "all his friends" or he could have celebrated the victory he & the one friend who stood with him won.  

Personally, I think he chose the latter.  

Friend…we are only here on planet earth for a short time. I want to encourage you to do your best to try & be a good friend!  Ask God for wisdom & discernment so that you can truly say the friendships in your life are real & not based on anything except a true love for Jesus & one another.

Proverbs 18:24 A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

God bless you!

Tuesday, November 1, 2016