Wednesday, April 28, 2010

A Seasoned Server

We frequently find ourselves eating at restaurants. I guess it’s a pre-requisite if you’re going to be in the ministry. It seems that a majority of our meetings take place around a bowl of chips & salsa accompanied by a large sweet tea for me and a diet coke for Beverly.

I remember when we came to BFWC in 1999 every family in the church was determined to take us to dinner. We were very appreciative of their offer and thrilled to break bread with our new congregation. However, what we didn’t realize was they all wanted to take us to the exact same restaurant. We laugh about that to this day. And by the way, we haven’t eaten at that restaurant for years – I guess we got burned out on it.

One thing I admire about a quality restaurant is the professionalism of their team. From the hostess who seats us, the server who waits on us to the manager who checks on us – if you’re in a place that is service driven, you’re in for a good experience.

Having served in customer service for many years, I’m a stickler for quality, not to mention I’m melancholic by nature and I recognize immediately the difference between excellent service and poor service.

I’m always thrilled to be greeted by my server within 2-3 minutes of being seated in their section. I appreciate the appetizer suggestion but I don’t want to be badgered into buying a basket of mozzarella sticks. Honestly, skip the beer & wine sales pitch…get straight to my sweet tea order, followed by a salad with ranch dressing and then my entrée in a timely manner. Can someone say DELICIOUS?

Now here’s what I love about a seasoned server: They pay careful attention to your need for a refill. But the best part is they don’t interrupt your conversation to ask the obvious … “would you like a refill?” They just do it! In fact, a seasoned server is invisible. You don’t even see them give you a refill.

Now consider this:

  • Acts 6:3 3Wherefore, brethren, look ye out among you seven men of honest report, full of the Holy Ghost and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business.

The Apostles were looking for “servers” to carry forth the business of the church. In other words, someone who waits tables. Think about it…waiting tables in God’s Kingdom requires a high standard. (Honest, full of the Holy Ghost and wise)

Waiting tables in the natural and serving in the ministry are very similar. What those early deacons did by way of feeding the widows natural food was in spiritual contrast to prayer and the Word of God for the church.

If you don’t have a desire to serve people – you shouldn’t serve in ministry. Focus on the word DESIRE. In fact, it’s the first thing mentioned in the requirements for the ministry.

  • 1 Timothy 3:1 1This is a true saying, If a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work.

Have you ever met someone who has such a desire to serve in ministry that they’re willing to serve in any capacity, regardless of pay? However, I’ve seen those same people change by losing their desire for serving the Lord and His people soon after they get the “position” they’ve been searching for.

Their desire is diminished by stress, circumstances, people, things, etc. Things aren’t what they appeared at first and suddenly they lose their love for the ministry they once craved.

In the ministry, we cannot avoid people or problems. In fact, without people we wouldn’t have a need for ministry. If we’re going to serve in ministry, we must retain our love for people. Parents don’t lose their love for their children. Even if the child breaks a dish, marks the walls with crayons or gets a bad grade on their report card. Why? Because of unconditional love and a sincere desire to be a good parent.

When you love your kids, you’ll go to the moon and back again to express that love. Our love and desire for Jesus, people and the ministry not only sustains us…it constrains us.

  • 2 Corinthians 5:14 14For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if one died for all, then were all dead:

When we draw strength from the love of Christ, our love for serving people is more than a task to be endured…it’s a JOY! Regardless of the trials, tribulations and troubles that often come with serving our love for God sees us through it!

Think about what a waiter in a restaurant endures:

  • Their job can be taxing physically, mentally and emotionally.
  • Someone who serves in ministry will have all that plus spiritual demands.
  • When people are hungry they can be rude.
  • They can be hard to please.
  • Isn’t the same true in the ministry for people who are spiritually hungry?
  • Some people make you think you can’t do anything right.
  • In the body of Christ there are the SWEETEST and the MEANEST.
  • Then consider the jealousy that comes from other waiters when a big tipper sits in the other waiters section.
  • They’re all supposed to be working on the same team, for the same company, for the same boss, for the same goal and yet envy still creeps in.
  • And yet, even though this is sinful, I’ve run into “teammates” who become jealous of another person’s success in ministry.
  • Watch out!

  • Proverbs 3:31 Envy thou not the oppressor, and choose none of his ways.
  • Proverbs 14:30 A sound heart is the life of the flesh: but envy the rottenness of the bones.

Waiting tables in ministry or at a restaurant requires certain expectations. You are expected to please your boss (the company) and the customer. If your boss is unhappy with your work, you could get fired. If the customer is unhappy with your service you’ll lose the tip.

And yet, even though it’s difficult and a balancing act at times, there great rewards from serving. If you do your job well, everyone is happy. (i.e., you boss, the customer, your co-workers, the cook, the cashier and the custodian) EVERYONE WINS when we do our job well!

Placing yourself in the role of “service” can be humbling. But isn’t this what Jesus did?

  • Mark 10:45 For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.

Honestly, I don’t want anyone preaching in our pulpit that isn’t willing to mop a floor or scrub a toilet. Regardless of their educational status, if they’re not willing to do the “menial” task without an audience then they don’t earn a spot in my book to do the “large” performance in front of the masses.

  • Matthew 23:11 But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant.

In ministry and restaurants alike, the server must have a “right fit.” I feel it’s very important not to jump at the first opportunity that presents itself. Let me make an observation. If a restaurant has to advertise that they need help, then consider this possibility: there’s a reason they need a new waiter and there’s a reason they have to advertise. I would want to know what those reasons are before I jumped in head first.

Can the same be said of a church? Sure. Before you make a commitment you need to know the sustained climate of that church. Sustained climates produce cultures. Understanding this will be revelation that could spare your from having a “bad taste” in your mouth.

What does it mean to serve? Does it mean we stand around doing nothing, twiddling our thumbs? The definition of SERVE means: to work for somebody; provide for; be useful; assist; have a particular effect; etc.

In other words, to work for someone while providing the best assistance possible to achieve a desired result for the one we’re serving.

Is this what Isaiah 40:31 means? But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.

Our strength will be renewed when we serve the Lord by serving His people. An effective, waiter, pastor, ministry leader, etc., follows

We serve the Lord by serving His people. In order to be a good waiter, or a good pastor, there are certain basic principles we must follow.


#1 Don’t Be Late
I was taught that if you show up on time you’re late. If you show up early…you’re on time. Nothing is more aggravating than waiting for someone to show up who is continually late. As table waiters (servants) we ought to be the first there and the last to leave.

#2 Don’t forget to Pray
If we ever needed God’s direction, we sure need it now! When you start your day (i.e., ministry event, activity, etc.) with prayer, you are less likely to error. It’s during our prayer that we can condition our heart to serve with humility, be a blessing to our peers, leaders and even the people we serve.

  • Colossians 3:23 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;

#3 Get Organized
Know your role and function. This requires research. Thankfully, the Scriptures are full of passages that deal with the role of servant hood. Knowing the ins and outs and the ups and downs of your particular field of service will help you be prepared to give the best possible service when called upon. One thing I love about Disney World employees is that everyone…from the person who picks up trash to the people who perform in the shows…they have all been trained to answer your questions the same. Bottom line: they know their role and function.

#4 Suit up
This is elementary. However, sometimes we need to be reminded to dress for success. Again, I know this is basic, but some people just don’t get it. Get a haircut; brush your teeth; press your clothes; take a bath; comb your hair; use a lint brush; carry mints; etc.

First impressions are lasting impressions. How people perceive you is how they receive you. If you’re going to serve someone, make sure you present yourself in the best possible light. Nothing worse than having someone wait on me in a restaurant who is sneezing all over my food and showcasing their tongue piercing in my face while they chew their gum to take my order. Let’s be CLASSY whether we serve in ministry or public service. Before you step out of the house, look in the mirror and ask “would I wait on myself?” If you critique yourself first, you just might silence your critics before they have a chance to form a negative opinion.

#5 Be Agreeable
Don’t be argumentative and hard to get along with. (2 Timothy 2:24 And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all.) When we serve, we will have to serve through conditions that aren’t always pleasant. Grin and bear it.

#6 Work on Tolerance
You’re going to encounter picky people who will have you run all over the map before they finally decide what it is they really want. While you’re jumping through hoops to please everyone don’t allow the demand of ministry expectations to cause you to get snippy.

You'll hear things like this: “It’s too loud.”, “it’s too cold.”, “the sermon’s too long”. Friend, the list goes on. My advice is to keep going! Don’t let the fastidiousness of people wear you out.

  • Galatians 6:9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

In time, you’ll see the results you’re looking for. It might not happen overnight, but believe me it will happen. If you get discouraged now you’ll quit before your harvest comes. It is too soon to quit!

#7 Be Watchful
As a servant, you learn through tenure the appropriate way to serve. You remain constantly aware of the ones you’re serving. They don’t have to ask for a refill…you just see that it is taken care of. Like a shepherd who watches over his sheep, he knows the condition of the ones he serves even if the sheep can’t see him. Always keep your eyes open when serving. Look for ways to use the gifts you’ve been given in a non-intrusive or ill mannered way. If you neglect your post, you may not have a post to serve at later.

#8 Offer an Apology
If we fail in our service, we must simply ask for forgiveness. Believe me, when you serve, you’ll make mistakes. The worse thing we can do is to try and hide it or make excuse for it. The best thing we can do is to confess it and make it right. Friend, we can overcome any failure if we finish strong! Overcomers are called overcomers because they had something to come over!

Consider Jesus who came not to be served but to serve and give His life a ransom for many.