Answer: Strong DADS.
Paul said in 1 Thessalonians 2:12 That ye would walk worthy of God, who hath called you unto his kingdom and glory.
Paul speaks of living a life "worthy of God" in every day life. Have you ever wondered what your life would look like if caught on camera? Literally, your wife, children, coworkers and friends have video camera eyes and audio recording ears. They see EVERYTHING.
Authentic means you are the same on the outside as you are in the inside.
Two Ways To Be Authentic:
1. Walk The Talk. Authentic people don't have to state, 'I'm a Christian." They simply live their life in such a way that reflects Christ. Authentic people don't say one thing and then do another. An example would be - a man tells his children not to tell lies but then gets a phone call at home from someone he doesn't want to talk to, so he whispers to one of his kids, "Tell them I'm not in and won't be back for three days."
Or, he attends church and puts on a peaceable front to his peers but when he gets home he uses anger to get his way with a family member. Is that walking the talk?
At work he wears a WWJD bracelet and then goes home with some stolen office supplies. Is that walking the talk?
What do you think his co-workers think about him when he laughs at dirty jokes right after telling them about the church revival he attended the night before?
Our actions set an example of how our kids - our spouse - our coworkers - will view God.
We should strive to be AUTHENTIC, but when we fall short we should be willing to admit when we've blown it. They already know we've blown it. Hey, they live with us. Not hard to spot. We need to apologize to them and ask for their forgiveness. We're teaching them that when they make a mistake it's not the end of their world, but that they can admit it and grow from it.
2. Keep Your Word. If you promise your kids or spouse something, KEEP IT. Be consistent with your promises. The number one resentment with kids is the broken promises of their parents. To a child, "Probably, perhaps and maybe" means YES. Only mention out loud what you can follow through on.
One of the biggest areas that we often disappoint our family is with our time schedule. To enable you to keep your promises make appointments with loved ones non-negotiable commitments. Put them on your calendar first and then schedule other things around them. By doing that they learn to trust that you're a man of your word, otherwise you won't spend the quality time with them you should.
Two Ways To Be Available:
A man needs to be available to his family and God. Here's a couple of ways to consider...
1. To Family. Too often as men we focus on being a success at work and then don't have an availability with our time or energy for our children and wife. Or when we are with them we sometimes make them feel like we can only spend time with them during the commercials. The message we are giving them is that they aren't a priority.
It's a CONSTANT BALANCING ACT for men. Try this:
- Live in the now. When you spend time with the family - "be there." That means not just physically being there, but also emotionally. Actually be involved in whatever you're doing and not focus on what you think you'd rather be doing.
- Plan time together. It could be a once a week family fun night doing something everyone enjoys.
- Date your mate. Plan a night out together for some face-to-face time. Have fun. Eat at your favorite restaurant or see the movie she wants to see (one that doesn't have karate and spaceships. LOL).
- Spend time with your kids. What can you do with your child(ren). An exclusive time with dad - hiking - zoo - park - getting ice cream - going to the mall. Time to talk. When your child knows they can have your full attention they will often share their deepest thoughts and heart with you.
- Good listening. Perhaps the hardest thing for men to do. If your family is going to talk, then they have to know you're willing to listen. This means you have to get rid of distractions. Turn off the TV. (March Madness - College Basketball) Get away from the computer so you can focus on the person and the conversation you're going to have. Listen without interrupting or changing the subject. Maintain eye contact. Eye contact sends a powerful message to them that what they're saying is important. Plus it also lets you watch their body language, which tells you what they're really trying to say.
- Lead your family into a vital relationship with Jesus. This is our #1 priority. Since more things are "caught than taught," you model this by having a daily relationship with Jesus Christ as your Lord (Matthew 22:37). We need to take time to study the Bible so we can know God and know His will for our lives. Through the Word of God and talking with God through prayer, God works on the inner man so we can become a man after God's own heart. As your family sees you growing and changing it will help them understand what a relationship with our Lord is all about.
- Pray for and with your wife and children. When praying for your children, bless them in the name of Jesus. Implements the Three A's of Prayer, meaning, we all can pray ANYTIME, ANYWHERE and about ANYTHING!
