Friday, January 21, 2011

Comparing Apples to Oranges

On more than one occasion I have said, "BFWC is not a perfect church but it's definitely a good church." 

Often, people who are looking for the "perfect church" become discouraged when they don't find it.

If you've ever transitioned from one church to another, you can find yourself comparing apples to oranges.

Each church is unique and carries it's own DNA and culture.  Adjusting to that new culture takes time and an open mind.  In fact, I share with new families at BFWC, "...see past where we are now to what we shall be, with you in the picture."

When I speak with new families, who have been very active in a previous church or have quality gifts and skills to offer, I encourage them to let their gift make room for them over the process of time.  Time is always the great leveler.

Honestly, we must "know one another" after the Spirit, for true ministry cohesion.  If time is not given, and restlessness sets in, then fruition of ministry opportunity is aborted.

Of course, many of these concerns are a non issue when you're discipling a "new convert" who has no previous church background. 

I do not want to sound rude...however, it is often easier to raise up a disciple from infancy for Kingdom Work than to try to "retrain" someone who has already "locked in" to a previous mindset.  The usual conversation from this person normally sounds like this "....at my old church, we did it this way." 

There's no harm in garnering ideas from a previous church or even new ideas gleaned in the field of today's methods.  However, if we continue to look back to "yesterday," we're really never free to forge ahead into "tomorrow."

If you're trying to adjust to a new church home, here's ten things I would do:
  1. Attend all the services that the church has to offer.  (i.e., Sunday, mid-week, prayer, etc.) You'll find that each service has it's own uniqueness and tailored qualities. 
  2. Attend for at least a month, so you can get a well rounded conception of the overall ministry of the church.
  3. If the church has multiple morning services, try attending each of those to see which is the right fit for you and your family.
  4. Ask questions about the church's vision, leadership, outreach, kids ministries, volunteer protocols, etc. to appropriate ministry coordinators.
  5. Research the church's website and find answers to questions you may have before you make an appointment with the pastor(s).  Take time to read through the churches doctrinal commitment and note any questions you may have.  Then, in that initial meeting, you'll have all your notes to pull from and have any unanswered questions resolved.
  6. Attend age and gender group events that pertain to you.  You'll find it easier to make friends if you attend fellowship opportunities where people are "fellowshipping." 
  7. If the church has a "new comers" class or something similar (i.e., meet and greet, etc.) avail yourself to that as well.  Usually you'll have a good experience and be directed to the "next step."
  8. Do your best to avoid comparing previous churches with a new one.  If where you were attending was so right, then perhaps you should go back there.  If not, then look for the good and expect the best in your new environment.  Even if you are disappointed with certain aspects, don't let it cloud your vision.  You might be the missing ingredient that they've been waiting for.  However, if you don't walk it out...you'll abort what could have been.
  9. Be faithful in your attendance.  Allow the leadership to see your face continuously.  Before long, not only will they remember your name...they'll seek you out to make a connection.  Whenever the church is providing corporate worship or discipleship...you should be there.
  10. Make an investment of your time, talent and treasure.  As a believer you're already a tither (10% of your increase).  So don't let up, even in your new church home.  You'll find it's harder to walk away from that which you've made an investment.
Finally, I would encourage you to "buy-in" to the overall vision of the church before you "lock-in."  You'd be surprised at the amount of people who have shook my hand following their first visit to a service and say "this is where God told me to join" only to never see them again. 

BFWC is not a perfect church...but it is a good one.  I also believe our church isn't the only one God's using.  We're just one of many, good churches, He has birthed.

May I add one more thought?  If there's something you don't understand or agree with...before you rush to judgment...get to know the leadership of the church.  Unless you've walked in the spirit of that church and under that particular ministry leader for a good period of time, you'll not really comprehend the history behind a statement or the spirit behind the leader.

Assumicide has killed many would have and could have opportunities.

Alright...who wants an apple and who wants an orange?